My heart hurts this day.
I have long contemplated where my voice belongs on issues that are “distant” from my own personal narrative and identity. Many times, I am fearful that my words will be out of touch from the very real and lived experiences of those who face social injustices on a daily basis. I am fearful that by speaking from a point of privilege I will cloud or disrupt the narratives that truly deserve to be heard. Yet my heart hurts too badly to say nothing. I am fearful that my silence or inaction will imprison me to perceptions of apathy, or worse, will serve as an endorsement of social injustice.
So today I speak.
I am a White, Cisgender, Heterosexual woman and as such, I am afforded privileges unknown to countless equally deserving persons. I’ve come to realize that my privilege is more visible to me on some days than others. This week especially, as I watch the LGBTQ and Black community fight for their much deserved equality, I have become acutely cognoscente and overwhelmingly ashamed of my privilege because I have watched it manifest into the mistreatment of others.
Let me explain.
My privilege allows me to one day marry the man I love. For this I am truly blessed. Through marriage, my partner and I will enjoy governmental benefits, we will be able to celebrate our commitment and admiration for one another without disparagement or judgment, and together we will be able to apply for housing without a fleeting concern of potential discrimination. My privilege allows me to love, and be loved freely- a right that should be available to all.
My privilege assures that I will never personally face the visceral horror of racially motivated police brutality. I will never wonder if my arrest or conviction was somehow dependent on the color of my skin. Should I ever take to the streets to fight the good fight for justice, my privilege would paint me as a martyr, while my brothers and sisters in Baltimore are condemned for their “thuggery.” My privilege affords me protection from the abuse and tyranny of the state – again, a right that should be available to all.
So, yes, my heart hurts this day. Today I am ashamed because our world is a place where people still have to FIGHT for the rights that were arbitrarily handed to me. Today I am ashamed of those who denounce and criticize people’s efforts for inclusion and equality. Today I am ashamed by Facebook posts and Twitter updates that are apathetic to an endless history of marginalization and oppression.
Today, I am ashamed of privilege and the blindness it has caused.
So while I do not speak in place of those who are suffering, I do speak to honor them: I speak of their valor, their resilience, their courage, and their strength. And on this day, let it be known that their story, the injustices that they have endured are not (and will never) be lost on me.
{Her}oic 